Strangers for Ancestors #17: Peace
Yes, I know that last post was intense … and sounded antisemitic. It hurt me to write it, yet it was also cathartic. I’m not antisemitic; as I’ve previously shared, I’m Jewish through ancestry (great grandmother), but not raised Jewish, though I was raised within a community in which Judaism was well respected. Growing up there was a small, but influential and well-connected Jewish community in our small city of Billings, Montana. My parents had various Jewish friends, as did I. I first remember learning of my Jewish family history when I was in 5th grade and I had an assignment in class for which I was paired with a girl named Lisa Sukin. Her family owned a well-respected sporting goods shop in our local mall, Kings Sporting Goods. My parents were outdoors enthusiasts, so we would shop at Kings frequently. That’s where they would buy our X-country ski equipment and clothing, running shoes, camping gear, etc. Through their patronage of the store, my parents got to know the Sukins and had much respect for them. When I told my dad about the school assignment and working with Lisa, he noted, “Oh yes, their family is Jewish.” He then proceeded to tell me that our family also had Jewish roots through his grandmother’s family. He encouraged me to get to know Lisa better and perhaps become friends. I liked Lisa Sukin, she was nice, smart, pretty, well-dressed; and I enjoyed working with her; however, I already had a best friend, Carolyn Smith, and we spent almost all of our free time together.
My Jewish and not-Jewish family members, Back row: Lloyd Greene (great, great uncle), Nani Greene (great, great grandmother), Harry Kemp (great grandfather), Lotte Greene Kemp (great grandmother), in front: Jean Kemp (grandmother), Judith Gap, Montana, 1916
Another 5th-grade classmate who was Jewish, Sheldon Alweiss had dyslexia, and I remember we had a whole morning devoted to learning what it meant to have dyslexia and his mother came to class to help explain it. That’s also how we learned about diabetes, through another classmate who had the disease and we had the same protocol of devoting a segment of the class to learning what it was and how the student, as well as everyone else should help to ensure he’d be taken care of. I appreciated these acts of collective learning and care. Then there was the Sunday school visit to the Beth Aaron Jewish Temple to learn how other people observe religion. This was through the Methodist Church, which Carolyn’s family belonged; both our families had belonged to the Presbyterian Church and both families left - mine to a Baptist Church first, then to a Lutheran Church. Carolyn’s moved to the Methodist Church, and I would go with her to that church on the weekends I’d sleep over, which was frequently, and the visit to the Temple happened to be one of those Saturdays. Carolyn was/is from a mixed race family - Sioux and white-European. As with the lessons of care in elementary school, I appreciated being introduced to other faiths.
At another point when I was in junior high and my brothers were playing minor league baseball, their coach began having the team pray before the games; one of the mother’s of a player on the team, asked that they stop because it was a Christian prayer they were reciting and their family was/is Jewish. I remember there was some pushback, but in the end they agreed to pray to God, and not Christ the Lord and that seemed to be okay with all the parents. In junior high, I also babysat for two summers, three days/week all-day for a Jewish family - the Gages; I loved their family and thoroughly enjoyed working for them. In all honesty, I preferred the culture of the Jewish families; however, I also rejected the organized religious parts of both Christianity and Judaism early on. It wasn’t that I didn’t believe in ‘God’ or Jesus, it was that I didn’t believe in ‘God’ or Jesus in the way they did. I had my own belief system, which was personal and it was a more inclusive belief system, meaning I did include animals, plants, and the land as part of my observance, which in part was likely an influence from my best friend Carolyn. And because I spent so much time alone, it just became my world and a part of who I was/am.
I share all of this because it’s the early culture and community I grew up in, one in which Christianity and Judaism were viewed as different ways of observing, one wasn’t better, just different, and for the most part, folks respected that. And that is the lens from which I grew through.
My education on the Holocaust was more patchwork. I remember learning about it early as a child, but not really having any context to understand it. By the time we were learning about it in high school, I was already drinking heavily and was not really grasping or learning anything. My focus was on alcohol. However, by that time I was in college, it was a subject which people discussed and I had come to have a better understanding and of course, knew the basic framework and numbers, but not much else. And there were many folks from Jewish backgrounds in my community in Oregon, so I also learned through them. I knew that antisemitism was the hatred of Jews; however, I did not understand the extent of antisemitism and the tropes used during Nazi Germany until I unintentionally made an ugly demonstration of it in the ceramics studio at the University of Oregon.
L —> R: James with his sculptures in Eugene, Oregon, 1993; me and James at Oddball film and video following the memorial of Stephen Parr at the Roxie Theater, 2018 (James and Stephen Parr were close friends for over 40 years).
One night my friend Margaret (also from Billings, MT) and I were working in the ceramics studio at the University of Oregon where we both had transferred from universities in Montana. It was after class hours and we were the only ones there except for a guy named James Simon who was ‘a lot’ older than us (he was 36 we were 20) and not a student. He was taking a non-degree ceramics class that allowed him access to use the studio. He was creating large scale whimsical ceramic sculptures and doing a raku glaze and fire on them in a raku kiln he had built at the studio. James’ work is some of the best ceramic sculpture work in the world today. Margaret and I were sitting at one of the tables making hand built slab mugs, or at least I was; James was across the room building a fantastic accordion man.
We were the only three in the studio and making small talk, and Margaret asked James what his family’s background was, and before he could answer, I jokingly said, ‘he’s Jewish, look at his nose’. Margaret got really serious and said, ‘Megan, that’s really antisemitic,” and I asked James if I was right, to which he laughed and said yes, but that Margaret was also right. And they both had to explain to me what antisemitism was. I thought my comment was akin to someone thinking I was Irish because of my red hair, which often happens, and I do have Irish ancestry. I was so ashamed and felt horrible to have said something so offensive and connected to such a horrific crime against humanity. Thank god, James was/is so kind and was light-hearted about it, and thank god, Margaret spoke up and called me out on it. James and I went on to become very close friends, and today we are still family.
And then there’s my best friend of over 30 years, who I met in grad school through my former boyfriend who went to college with her. I love and care so much about her, but our friendship completely fractured over October 7th, with her being anti-Zionist prior to the massacres, and becoming Zionist after, which has been and continues to be devastating for me. I was shocked when she chose orthodoxy over Jewish Voice for Peace, which seems so much more of who I’ve known her to be.
Amy and I, photoshoot for Swell exhibition, 1996
In between all of these relationships there have been numerous friendships and romantic relationships with many people who are Jewish, probably 40% or more, out of a population which is only 3% of the general population, and in none of those relationships has Judaism ever been an issue. So really, I’ve always felt part of the Jewish diaspora, and not because of my ancestral connection, though that is the obvious, but it’s because of my relationships, I’ve felt included in that diaspora.
The primary reason for my rejection of organized religion is the hypocrisy. I could not understand why there were people who were suffering when clearly the means existed to help them, and not just scraps, there was great wealth within the churches and other faith-based entities themselves and within the congregants to help people who were struggling. And the United States was built on a Judeo-Christian belief system, so why weren’t we ensuring the wellbeing of all peoples, why would we allow anyone to suffer? It never made sense, and I could never get an acceptable answer, nor did anyone seem that interested in taking it up as a priority. So I began to see the church as a community space to socialize and receive forgiveness for bad behavior; rather than as a space focused on honoring the teachings of Christ. Later I would come to understand it as a tool for people with power and money, which meant primarly white men, to use to control the rest of the population and to give them justification or forgiveness for their bad behavior. This has become especially clear with the overwhelming number of cases of pedophilia within the Catholic Church, as well as clergy of other denominations, and most recently with the greatest crimes against humanity leveled at the Palestinian peoples by two countries both rooted in religious frameworks, the United States and Israel. Of course no one is perfect, but we can at least recognize that sexual assault, especially against children and mass murder are ungodly and break the tenets of the three religions which originated from the Levant.
However, I also know that there are many instances in which churches, temples, and mosques have served a great deal of good in the world and have been beneficial for members who prioritize the tenets of their religions to truly uplift all living beings and to work collectively through their faith-based congregations to help ensure the safety and livelihoods of all beings.
Me and my mother during the Christmas holidays. At the age of two, I was already feeling the weight of the world and its inequities.
Circling back around to the comments in my last blog about the Holocaust, Blood Libel, etc., which could easily be perceived as antisemitic, my intention here was not to dismiss these heinous crimes, but to note the outsized attention given to Jewish concerns of antisemitism, often connected to the Holocaust in relationship to the many horrorific crimes and experiences of other groups of people. There really are many more articles news stories, movies, and TV shows which positively touch on Jewish concerns more often than other ‘minority groups.' How often do we hear about Pol Pot and the Killing Fields in Cambodia (1975-1979)? or Suharto and the genocide towards ethnic Chinese, communists, intellectuals, and artists in Indonesia (1965 - 1998) or South African apartheid (1948-1994), or the Armenian genocide (1915-1917)? or the ethnic cleansing of the Croats during the Bosnian War (1992-1995)? Rarely. And until recently, how often did we hear about the subjugation and apartheid treatment of Palestinians (1967-present day)? Almost never because there has been an active public relations campaign - the Israel Lobby - to prevent everyone outside of the Islamic world from knowing the true history of Israel and Palestine since the United Nations Resolution 181 was passed, making Israel a legitimate Nation State.
It should be noted that not one of the nation states in the region, who were part of the United Nations voting body, voted in favor of Resolution 181 - Afghanistan, India, Iran, Iraq, Lebanon, Greece, Turkey, Egypt, Pakistan, Saudi Arabia, Syria, and Yemen. This rejection of Israel was NOT because these states hated Jews, it was because Palestine already existed and the plan for Israel was a plan to violently remove Palestinians from their ancestral homeland, which is exactly what has happened over the past 76 years. And rather than listening to those who would be impacted by this ill-conceived and racist political act, western powers ignored these nations and allowed for the situation for which we now find ourselves watching a livestreamed Genocide and the extreme environmental damage being caused by it. We must also understand that prior to 2023, there have been numerous attempts to hold Israel accountable for its crimes against humanity in its treatment of Palestinians, as well as for Israel’s illegal occupation of Palestinian lands and for allowing illegal settlements; however, the one body who could have and should have enforced it - the United States of America, chose not to; instead the US has continued sending tens of billions of dollars in aid and military support to Israel continuously to allow it to carryout its crimes against humanity.
It’s truly shocking and it has helped lead to a world in which there are no rules, and there are no real truths, everything is up for interpretation and the folks who have decided to stop honoring any of the previously accepted tenets - the Bilble, the Torah, international law, schoolyard rules, the U.S. Constitution, kindergarten rules, etc. - those are the folks who also have control over the military and/or have amassed stockpiles of weapons.
Really, brace yourself. We are in for a very violent ride. And if you think your immune, think twice because there are many folks who thought everything was fine and they were immune, until it wasn’t and they weren’t.
In addition to Israel’s war against Palestine, there is currently an active campaign to make any criticism of Israel illegal and to favor the discomfort of Zionists over the the rights of Palestinians and their allies to speak out agains the apartheid treatment of Palestinians and the Genocide being waged by Israel. To speak out against genocide is exactly what Jews and their allies have been taught to do, it’s what I was taught to do. Beginning in college, following my antisemitic comment to James, and through till today, I have done a lot of reading and research about the Holocaust, including watching the hours upon hours of footage filmed by the Nazis in the concentration camps and for their eugenic studies, as well as the films of Leni Reifenstahl. So for me it’s become a question of WHY? Why should we continue to be reminded of all the horrors of Nazi Germany and World War II, what is the point if it’s not to identify and stop another genocide? Because then it’s just atrocity porn, people getting a high from seeing others in pain and anguish, and it’s a racial question - Why are the United States and Israel granted a pass to do whatever it is they want to do and in the case of Palestine, to treat the Palestinians as animals? (also wrong to treat animals with such abuse!)
And why is it we even have to ask these questions? Why aren’t we asking why are people so ignorant and so cruel? Why aren’t we treating every human being and every living being as worthy of life and of a good life and one in which we’re all happy? As a species who has the ability to use our bodies and minds, why aren’t we using these for good and for everyone to have a good life? Why would we discriminate against anyone? Why wouldn’t we build a world in which the goal is to ensure everyone is taken care of and is not suffering? - that was/is the true message of God - the Christian God, the Muslim God, and the Jewish God - the message wasn’t for people to play God and to adopt false gods such as power and money. And for those who aren’t believers, the benefits of ensuring EVERYONE’S wellbeing would be great as well, and the resources exist to do so. By not doing so, humanity is at the precipice of collapse.
I pray for peace and love for all and for humanity to become one which stops playing God, because it is destroying all of us.
